Holding Both: Laughter, Pain, and What It Means to Be Human
April 1st has always been one of my favorite days.
I love humor.
I love lightness.
I love the kind of moments that make people smile when they least expect it.
There’s something about laughter that feels… regulating. Connecting. Human.
And yet—April also holds something very different.
April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month.
And after spending over a decade working in that field, I don’t take that lightly.
Not even a little.
So here we are.
A day that celebrates jokes and laughter…
in a month that asks us to hold space for pain, trauma, and some of the hardest realities people experience.
And if that feels like a contradiction…
It’s not.
It’s actually one of the most honest reflections of what it means to be human.
Because we are built to hold both.
But there’s another layer to this that I’ve seen over and over again in my work with survivors.
Something that doesn’t get talked about enough.
Many survivors don’t hesitate to share their story because of shame.
They hesitate because of “the look.”
You probably know the one.
The shift in someone’s face.
The pity.
The quiet reframe of who they now believe that person to be.
And in that moment, something subtle—but powerful—happens:
👉 The person is no longer seen as a whole human being.
They are seen as what happened to them.
👉 This is something I understand not just professionally—but personally.
And that’s the part that often hurts the most
Because survivors are not:
just trauma
just pain
just what happened
They are:
complex
resilient
funny
capable
human
And yes…
They can laugh.
They can joke.
They can enjoy April Fool’s Day.
That doesn’t take away from what they’ve been through
It actually reinforces something important:
👉 Trauma is part of their story—not the whole story.
There’s also something else worth saying
There has been progress.
Research shows that rates of sexual assault have declined significantly since the 1990s—by roughly half in some national data sets.
And at the same time:
👉 Hundreds of thousands of people are still impacted every year
👉 Many cases are never reported
Both of those things are true
Progress…
and work still to be done.
Just like this moment
We can:
laugh
and hold awareness
We can:
enjoy life
and still care deeply
We can:
recognize growth
and still advocate for change
This is what it means to hold both
It means not reducing people to their hardest experience.
It means not avoiding difficult conversations.
It means expanding our capacity to see the full picture.
So today…
If you love April Fool’s Day—laugh.
Be playful.
Enjoy the moment.
And also…
Take a moment this month to:
listen
learn
support
or simply acknowledge
Because awareness isn’t about taking away joy
It’s about making sure no one is reduced to just their pain.
The bottom line
Being human isn’t about choosing one experience over another.
It’s about holding both:
👉 lightness and depth
👉 laughter and pain
👉 joy and awareness
And maybe most importantly:
👉 seeing people as whole—always.